she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
