When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
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