He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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