I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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