i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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