this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
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We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
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I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
All the doctor said was why
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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