You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
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She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
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I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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