he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
