Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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