Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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