the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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