Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
