He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize