New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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