So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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