Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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