Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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