Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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