we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
