Why are handjobs necessary in class?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
