i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
