you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
