The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize