so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
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hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
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The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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