I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
