Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
