Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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