Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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