he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize