East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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