still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Randomize