She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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