The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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