The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
