peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I want you more than these girls want KFC
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.