You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.