it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Randomize
