Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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