Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
