I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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