New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
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