I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
She has the best kind of daddy issues
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
