Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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