What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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