brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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