Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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