Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
