so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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