I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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