what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
