Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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