I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
